My Day With the Bengals

The following is an account of the events I witnessed during my trip to Cincinnati Bengals OTA (Organized Team Activities) session & stadium tour.

Understand that my day started at my house in Toledo, Ohio to make the trek to the Mecca of Bengaldom (exactly 201 miles according to Google maps). No amount of anticipation during the 2 hour and 30 minute drive could have prepared me for the day to come. My first view of Paul Brown Stadium from I-75 was breathtaking. Being a season ticket holder, I've seen PBS many times during the fall and winter months but there is something extra special when football is in the air in June. I made my way to the stadium offices and waited in the lobby where I was met by bittersweet feelings as I gazed into the display cases on the wall proudly revealing two Lamar Hunt Trophies heralding both the 1981 and 1988 seasons. Soon after, our tour guide, Andy Ware, came to whisk us away to a world that most fans never get to see.

At this point I was feeling the jubilant awe of a child's first trip to Disneyland...

Everything inside the stadium's front office seemed awesome (in the Biblical sense of the word), from the bathrooms to meeting rooms, offices to hallways… Yes, I had seen these common business essentials before in other places but this was The Cincinnati Bengals copy machine.

As we toured the stadium’s various game-viewing areas (Club Section, Press Box, Replay Booth etc.) our tour guide entertained us with interesting insider tid-bits such as where John Clayton and other ESPN celebs sit when their in town or how the room is mostly quiet during games until Geoff Hobson reacts to various on-field happenings. Right now, I’m thinking that we could end the tour; head home and all would be more than worth the journey. As practice time neared we took the mammoth elevators (Side Note: Guys like Anthony Munoz, Willie Anderson and Andrew Whitworth can’t just squeeze into your garden variety elevators, right?) down to the security station near the player’s locker room.

This, my friends, is where the magic happens.

Players trickle out of the locker room in pairs and groups. Some notes at this point: Andrew Whitworth: Man this guy is HUGE, not fat but he’s a very big boy. His upper body looks like it was whittled from one large hunk of steel and his head must be at least a size 8 or larger. This guy looks like Ivan Drago swallowed Rocky Balboa and then went back to Rocky III and ate Thunder Lips as well. He has the constant “I must break you” look. Needless to say I had to back up to take any semblance of a picture.
Leon Hall: This guy looks focused as he walks out of the tunnel and out of view. He’s got that moxie look that you want from a 1st round pick determined to do what he can to turn around a lack-luster defense. I breathe a sigh of relief.
Shayne Graham: He has a grin on his face, he’s happy to play football and ready for another day at the office. I notice that he seems to have unusually large arms for someone whose main source of income is his leg…weird.
Justin Smith: He’s walking with several other D-linemen (Geathers & Peko come to mind, among others). Regardless of your opinion of his on-field play, this guy was classy the whole day. It was refreshing to see most of the D-line walking out together eerily like Wyatt Earp & crew in Tombstone. I breathe a second (slightly larger) sigh of relief.
Carson Palmer: As I see him appear from the locker room my stomach is in my throat. I’m trembling at this point. As I fumble to grab my camera he starts to walk by… I can’t remember what happened next, I really think I blacked out for a second. The only real proof that I have of seeing Carson in that instant is a blurry off-center photo of him walking by the frame.

By now most of the player have made their way out to the practice field so we decide to head out. Following us was newly acquired veteran Linebacker Ed Hartwell who stopped just outside the gates to sign a child’s autograph before heading across the street.

Once inside the gates we see players participating in light position drills and general warm-up routines. The clicking of cleats behind me grabs my attention as Rudi Johnson heads through the gates and onto the field. He looks relaxed and surprisingly well groomed for a 228-pound, linebacker-bruising tailback. He looks like he’s ready for a night on the town not a full day of football. “He makes this look easy”, I thought. Not far behind him was Chad Johnson, lightly jogging and joking with anyone he came in contact with. As he trotted by us he flashed his charismatic gold smile and all I could think was “this is going to be fun”.

I staked out a position on the east side of the field snapping pictures of different drills I went. 300-pound o-linemen gracefully performing shuffling and footwork techniques, linebackers fielding simulated errant passes, running backs perfecting different cuts in slow motion, it wall all too much to take in. Even without pads on, these guys were larger than life. The action stopped in an instant at the sound of an air horn blast. To our left free safety, Dexter Jackson, was making his way to the group carrying the air horn. “Defensive leadership”, said, randomly, letting out my third sigh of relief.

For the next few minutes the players stretched as a team, defense on the left, offense on the right. There were few side conversations going on as players and coaches made pre-practice small talk only to be interrupted by Chad screaming “Hey JJ!” as Jeremi Johnson entered the field in a long sleeve windbreaker and winter cap. Someone standing near us told me that Jeremi has been working with the strength and conditioning coaches on a rehab plan, still, its good to see him putting in the time. The only other observation at this point is a curious little wiry offensive player with dreadlocks wearing full-length orange spandex. “Who is #18?” I asked, not knowing that would be the theme for the rest of the day. More on that later…

The horn sounds and players scramble to their next drill. On the south field the quarterbacks and Receivers work together on routes. On the north field Defensive Backs were doing drills of their own. Kyle Larson was punting on the west “turf” field while Shayne and Jeremi worked with the strength and conditioning coach. Two players stood out at this moment, Leon Hall and Keiwan Ratliff. Both have been knocked for their speed and both seemed to be moving at the same pace as everyone else throughout the course of the day.

As I turned to the south field to check out the receivers, an orange and white blip was flying through the air parallel to the ground laying out for an off target pass. “Who is #18?” I ask again, aloud, to no one in particular as this mysterious stocky, dreadlocked receiver made his way back to the end of the line amid congratulatory high-fives. As the next horn sounded Carson and Chad didn’t quite connect on a pass. This prompted Carson to sprint out to Chad. I need to tell you this was and unforgettable moment. Carson Palmer showing Chad Johnson how to run his route correctly. Carson mimicked the moves needed to properly time the route in an awkward fish-out-of-water fashion. Don’t get me wrong, I think Carson Palmer is an amazing athlete, but his “quarterback coordination” is different than Chad’s “wide receiver coordination”… very different.

Just when I thought things couldn’t get any better, we were witness to the WR/DB 1 on 1 drills.
Leon Hall vs. Chad Johnson: Chad juked off the line leaving Hall stumbling out of the blocks. Chad made a hard fake right about 5-7 yards down the field and then cut left to the middle of the field (poetry in motion) then out of nowhere our rookie 1st round pick recovered to punch the ball away leaving Chad frustrated and the rest of us on the defensive sideline amazed.
Skyler Green vs. Marvin White: Finally someone shouts the name “Green” and the mystery of #18 is solved. According to the roster on the team’s official website Green stands 5’9” (maybe counting his helmet and cleats) 190 pounds (maybe with pads on) and White stands 6’1” 199 (an undersized estimate if you ask me). White towers over Green and looks like he’s going to be a bruiser once he finally sees some live snaps. Green, on the other hand, takes off from the line of scrimmage (I swear his hair makes him look faster) cuts to the middle and back to the outside leaving White chewing on grass, burnt biting on the first move. That play caused a commotion on the sidelines and left me repeating the question of the day, “who is #18?” One other note from that drill: I know Gregg Guenther is 6’-8” so this may seem like an obvious statement but he is one tall dude. Come to think of it, so is Carson Palmer.

The horn sounded and I caught my first glimpse of Marvin Lewis talking with ESPN’s Chris Mortensen and Cincinnati native, Tom Jackson. This is also where we were introduced to, Bengals.com editor, Geoff Hobson. I must have missed the memo on Hawaiian shirt day since Hobson, Jackson and Mortensen were all sporting tropical threads… I digress… Some further pleasantries were exchanged between our group and some of the Bengals front office staff watching the various drills. This continued until the horn sounded yet again and we made our way to the north side of the practice area to observe the full 11 on 11 drills. A couple of things caught my eye:
Rudi Johnson: Not much to do for a running back during non-contact drills. He caught a few passes but not much else. Good… rest those legs Rudi; you’ll see plenty of action over the next 6-8 months.
Ed Hartwell & Dexter Jackson: Looks like Hartwell’s going to be an intimidating force at linebacker. Combine him with Dexter Jackson and you have a great mix of veteran leadership on defense. These two were talking and mixing it up with the offense the entire time. Skyler Green caught a ball over the middle and Hartwell gave him a two-hand tap and a loudly yelled “BOOM!” as if to indicate that, with pads on, there would be a much different result to that play. These two seemed to be on a mission to rewrite public opinion of the Bengals defense.
Marvin Lewis: Throughout most of practice I noticed Marvin on the outskirts watch carefully, allowing his assistant coaches to do their work. Every once and a while he would call a player over, at times he would issue a public reprimand or praise. There was a silent leadership present at all times, it was almost like the entire practice field itself responded to coach Lewis’ every move.
Carson Palmer: He looks great. Not spectacular. Not trying to set the world on fire. His throws were on target, he’s moving well. Very fluid. Here is a man who realizes that this is the beginning of June and the season is a marathon not a sprint. He’s got a swagger folks…

Practice concluded with the punt team and then another group stretch. At this time some local school kids were filing in to the outside of the field. As the players were gathered around Marvin for a quick group talk I the opportunity to get a few photos with Tom Jackson and Chris Mortensen. After the group broke away, players spent a few minutes signing autographs as the press zeroed in on Marvin. On the way off the field, players took the time to take pictures and sign autographs for just about everyone who asked. We trailed behind the pack of players to catch Marvin Lewis and Dexter Jackson posing for pictures with the few stragglers waiting outside the gates.

We walked back down the tunnel to lunch and continued our tour of the inner workings of the stadium. The experience was amazing, the players, administration and coaches were very courteous and welcoming. Even now I am still amazed at the events of the day and I can’t wait to see the Orange and Black take the field Monday night. After witnessing all that happened during practice and afterwards I am convinced that we have a team committed to winning for the community. There’s a new attitude in Cincinnati.

Who Dey

Another Reason Why Women Confuse Me

Ladies, imagine overhearing your boyfriend/husband/significant other on the phone with someone else and it sounds something like this:


"Honey why you calling me so late? It's kinda hard to talk right now.
Honey why are you crying? Is everything okay? I gotta whisper 'cause I
can't be too loud.

Well, my girl's in the next room. Sometimes I wish she was you.
I guess we never really moved on.

It's really good to hear your voice say my name, it sounds so sweet.
Coming from the lips of an angel, hearing those words it makes me weak.
And I never wanna say goodbye but girl you make it hard to be faithful, with the
lips of an angel.

It's funny that you're calling me tonight and, yes, I've dreamt of you too.
And does he know you're talking to me? Will it start a fight? No I don't think
she has a clue.

Well my girl's in the next room. Sometimes I wish she was you. I
guess we never really moved on. It's really good to hear your voice say my
name, it sounds so sweet. Coming from the lips of an angel, hearing those
words it makes me weak. And I never wanna say goodbye, but girl you make
it hard to be faithful, with the lips of an angel.

It's really good to hear your voice say my name, it sounds so sweet.
Coming from the lips of an angel, hearing those words it makes me weak.
And I never wanna say goodbye but girl you make it hard to be faithful, with the
lips of an angel."


What would you think? Other than the obvious: "Why is he conducting a conversation verse-chorus-verse-chorus-chorus format?" Would you be happy? Of course not. But if you hear something like this on the radio from a band called Hinder then you'd go nuts for a song like this. While I have to admit (even if it questions my masculinity) that the chorus is catchy, but it presents yet another reason why women confuse the heck out of me. Why do you like this song? Here's the scenario: this song comes on at work, all women between the ages 14-30 within earshot begin cooing and gasping in an effort to display their fondness for this song.

WHY?

This song is about a guy cheating on his significant other with his ex. Why on earth do women like this song? I guess its the same reason that Crazy B**ch is so popular as well as the thousands of rap songs that objectify women.

Respect yourself women. Oh, and please read Rob Bell's new book Sex God, it has awesome insights on the undeniable link between sexuality & spirituality.