1/4 of the way through nothing

10 days ago I started a spending fast for lent (link). After almost one quarter of the way through, I've run the gambit of emotions...

Day 1: The sound of the Pepsi machine outside my door is borderline unbearable. I work in a place where kids are around all of the time. Why God, why do those little brats have so much money? And why do they insist on buying beverages every 5 minutes? (first emotion, anger) This continues until I leave around 5pm.

Once I got home I see that my last pre-fast ebay purchase has arrived Atmosfear the DVD board game... I am overjoyed and all is right with the world (second emotion joy & hope).

Day 2: First off, I was late to work because of an alarm clock malfunction and that didn't make the Pepsi machine situation any better... this time the torture is compounded by the fact that I did not bring anything for lunch and I have made this stupid pact to not buy fast-food for myself... (anger & remorse) But the thought or driving to the local grocery store to buy cold cuts and bread seems to be too labor intensive (now the depression sets in).

Day 3: Its Friday, the work life gets easier since my wanton desire to purchase a Code Red Mt. Dew (pause for amorous reflection and drooling...cue Wayne's World "Dream Weaver" sequence) was subsided by the ammount of free food available at work today (manna from heaven as far as I'm concerned)

Later we hit up a wine tasting at Vino 100 which is ok since its a group event. I did resist the urge to buy a bottle of wine and Burger King, opting instead to make myself a sandwich at home...but those french fries did smell good (jealousy setting in, and maybe a hint of covetousness).

Next, the group heads out to see the Number 23, I had movie passes so no purchases were made.

Days 4 & 5: Jered, being the great and supportive friend that he is, tempts me several times by telling my how many cool things are going on sale at his store later this month. What a pal... (Sarcasm...is that even an emotion?)

Day 6: Lunch is no problem and neither is my beloved Code Red. I brought a friend down to work and she offered to buy me both! (Sweet!). Slowly I realize that a totally unplanned, but, awesome side-effect of not buying anything new is an increase in charity from other people... nice.

I also rented a video game... I didn't get the same satisfying feeling as I do when I buy a video game...

Day 7: I slipped... I was STARVING (not literally but I was in pain) so I went against my better judgement and bought myself Taco Bell (Guilt)... it wouldn't be right for me not to admit where I messed up... I feel like I've betrayed Jesus (more guilt), I should just stop this stupid fast anyway, besides I can still hold to my annual fast of WNBA and Women's College Basketball (justification, not an emotion but still...).

At our weekly Bible Study (held at Max & Erma's, but hey its bible study so its ok) I decide to get back on the horse and continue my shopping fast. To my surprise I've only browsed ebay twice in the past week and it was only because of Satan's tempting (really it was Jered, but close enough) me into looking up prices for a hookah. (don't ask...)

Day 8: Another Thursday goes by and there are more kids that mock me with every beverage purchase, but this time I am busy with work so their attempts go virtually unnoticed. (Side note: Abby rewards my spending freeze by making AWESOME dinners for me...except for the one batch of mashed potatoes that tasted like plastic...but the rest of it was awesome)

Day 9: Jered will not stop singing I'm So Ronery from Team America: World Police. I am so tempted to click the "buy it" button on iTunes, but I resist...for now (jerk) Another wine tasting... and this time I bought wine, which by now is an essential.... but maybe not 3 bottles....

Today is day 10 : I'm really starting to get a grasp on the extremes of my desire to be an uberconsumer. Now, I'm not saying that I'm cured or that I have come to some great revelation. I am still trying to figure this all out, but I know this much, I have a long way to go...